Raise The Anchor
Raise the Anchor- is a transformative podcast hosted by Melissa Burbridge, where ordinary people share extraordinary stories of life-changing moments.
From overcoming health challenges like a life-saving liver transplant to bold decisions like a career pivot or adopting a life-altering diet, each episode dives into the pivotal moments that reshaped lives for the better. Through Melissa's thoughtful interviews and powerful narratives, "Raise the Anchor" inspires listeners to let go of what holds them back and set sail toward a brighter future.
Join Melissa each week for stories that will spark inspiration, ignite courage, and remind you that it’s never too late to rewrite your story.
Raise The Anchor
From Feeling Stuck to Empowering Sisterhoods | Jess Clerke’s Journey
In this episode of Raise the Anchor, Jess Clerke shares her incredible transformation—from a digital marketer who relocated to Barbados during the pandemic and felt isolated and unsure, to becoming a confidence coach helping women rediscover their voice.
After returning to Canada, Jess tapped into her true superpower: guiding others to stand tall in their confidence. Now, she’s the powerhouse behind soul-nourishing retreats, women-led conferences, and a thriving sisterhood where community and courage go hand in hand.
We discuss motherhood, business, self-worth, and the magic that happens when women support one another.
Tune in to feel seen, inspired, and maybe even called to anchor into your next chapter.
Welcome to Raise the Anchor, the podcast that explores what happens when we stop drifting and start choosing. I'm your host, Melissa Burbridge, and each week we dive into real, raw stories of transformation, moments when people dared to raise the anchor and change course. Whether you're navigating chronic illness, burnout, fake life pivots, or healing from the inside out, you'll find inspiration and truth here on Raise the Anchor. This is your space for honesty, hope, and the courage to begin again. Let's raise the anchor and set your course. Today's episode is sponsored by Capture It Photography, headshots for people who hate having their photo taken. Today on the episode, I have Jessie Cleric here. She was a digital marketer turned coach for those who need more confidence. Welcome to the show. Thank you for having me. I'm so excited to be here. So happy to have you. You just give so much happy energy. I absolutely love it every day. So tell us a little bit about you.
SPEAKER_00:Oh, yeah. Oh, don't we love this question? Let me tell you about me. I am. Yeah. So I started in confidence coaching about five years ago. I was in the pandemic. And the reason why I stepped into it is because I moved away with my husband. We moved to Barbados. And I know everyone's like, oh, you were on a beach in the pandemic while I was here shoveling snow. Yeah, sounds great. But yeah. I had no life, no friends, to the point where I even had to ask my husband for money, right? Because I didn't even have credit cards for down there or anything like that. And it was just a season of me coming from an independent woman energy to all of a sudden I was Glenn's wife. And Glenn is incredible. I love him. But I always wanted to be more than just a wife. And it just really tore me down. Every day I'd wake up and I'd be like, oh, this is it. This is what I'm living for. And even the energy in Barbados is very different than Canada in the sense where they saw me as just a wife too. What are you doing at home all day? And at that point, I was an editor of a woman's wellness magazine. I was doing a network marketing business. I was doing work. It just didn't look like the work that they could see. And it was always like me questioning myself, me questioning everything. and crying a lot of days because my husband was working 12, 15 hours a day, seven days a week. And I was just really lonely. And yeah, it was a wild journey. And when I came home, I was like, everything's gonna be great when I get back to Canada. It's gonna be like, I'll have my car back, I'll have my life back, I'll have my money back, I'll have my business back, I'll have my friends back. And when I came home, essentially we were still in the pandemic at that point. And also I came home and realized, It wasn't Barbados. It was me. And it was time for me to make a big shift in my life. So I started to do something different and started to see myself differently. And it took some time, but it got me to a different place. And I started to see that there was more to me than just being Glenn's wife in the season again.
SPEAKER_01:So that brings me to our first question. What was the moment you realized something in your life had to change?
SPEAKER_00:It was when I came home and I came home and it, it didn't look like how I thought it was going to look. I really thought coming home was the answer. Being back in Canada was the answer and it just wasn't. So I started this project called the year of confidence. I was like, okay, we're going to do something. We're not going to stay in this energy forever. I'm going to start a podcast. And I had this like whisper when I was in Barbados to start a podcast, but I was like, you crazy. I'm a mess. I cannot, who's going to want to listen to that? No one's going to want to listen to me. And so when I came home, I finally decided to jump in and do it. And I'm really glad I did. And it was super scary to do, but it was the right move because it got me here into this season of my life. And that was, I started that in 2021. So that's about four years ago now.
SPEAKER_01:That's awesome. And your podcast is amazing. Thank
SPEAKER_00:you, my friend.
SPEAKER_01:Listen to it every week. So what did What did raising the anchor look like for you in your journey of doing that podcast? What did it release for you?
SPEAKER_00:It released, I think, the vision that I had for my life. Because even when I first started it, I was doing my network marketing. I was still working for the magazine. I was in this season of still thinking I was going to pursue digital marketing and start maybe even a digital marketing business. And as I started to do more and more episodes, and I would get very emotional in some of these episodes, it was that moment of realizing like oh I don't want that life that picture that I had isn't for me and I started to explore other options like bringing on maybe one-to-one clients or maybe hosting retreats and figuring out what worked best for me and thankfully it unfolded for me people started to come and they needed confidence too which was well I think we all did in that season and it really just started to unfold in front of me and it turned into a really beautiful business and I think just like I say by accident and I shouldn't give shouldn't put my credit like be like, oh, it's just by accident. But I feel like it just kind of fell into my lap for a lot of it. But raising the anchor was just putting myself out there and not being afraid to cry on a mic. Which is beautiful
SPEAKER_01:because so many people hold themselves back from that. So was there a specific fear or belief that you held held you back before this turning point?
SPEAKER_00:100 percent. All the fears, every single one of them, all of them. But most like the biggest one, I think, was my family knowing the truth. So, again, I hid from everyone in that season. Nobody knew I was struggling. Nobody knew I was crying every day. Nobody knew that I didn't like my time down there because I didn't want to put that pressure on anyone to. you know feel bad for me or to be like oh poor Jessica or to be worried about me and I think that comes a lot from like my family just not wanting to put that pressure on each other and so I would when I came home and I put out there okay this is it this is what actually happened my family had to know that I was struggling and I always have been like the strong one that you know didn't want to show that and so I remember putting that first podcast episode out there and like throwing up in my mouth and being like okay now the world is gonna know And thankfully, obviously didn't change her opinion of me.
SPEAKER_01:But I'm happy you bring it up in that sense because if you don't put yourself first, you definitely put others first. Oh, 100%. I hate calling you out on that. But you can even feel it at the retreat because she does this amazing thing if you ever have to go to her retreat. Highly recommend. You're going to cry. So bring tissues. I'll cry with you. It's okay. Oh, it's beautiful. It's absolutely beautiful. But she puts these bags across for comments and everybody wants to give you compliments and comments and you don't want to be singled out in that because you feel like it's for the other women. We're looking up to you for that piece too. So I can totally see where you didn't want to put yourself first, but you needed to. So how did you overcome the fact that you weren't putting yourself first and going to your family?
SPEAKER_00:I think I just started doing it more and more. And through this transition, and I know, again, we talked about this at the retreat, not to like bring it all up, but like we talked about human design, learning that about myself also helped me to put my walls down a little bit more on who I am and allowing there to be, because I've always felt different in that sense and that gave me that permission slip to see myself differently and that really helped in that season but also just doing it more and more and more putting myself first and before I would isolate myself hide it so nobody knew and now it's almost like a little bit more of a you know figuring things out and bringing everyone along through this whole process and that has helped me to just see a different light to see a different story and to let there be You know, opportunity for others to support me too.
SPEAKER_01:So after you let your family in, how did your support system or lack thereof one shape you and transform you into what you are today?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I actually am really, really blessed. I have an incredible support system around me. Even when we're recording this, I have a four-month-old baby and, you know, he's at home with his dad. And it wasn't even a question this morning like, hey... you know, you're going to leave me here with this baby. Like he's like, almost like when I suggested like, maybe I should cancel, you know, my baby's not feeling that great today. And he's like, what's that supposed to mean? you don't trust me and I'm like okay we're just gonna leave right and it's just this reminder of there's people around us who want to support us and I've been really really blessed with that both when with an incredible partner and also with a family who's also entrepreneurs and although they don't totally understand how I do business because they're a brick and mortar business and have been for 40 plus years but I've always seen my family pursue their dreams so it never felt strange for me and I also have an incredible sister who has always been very supportive friends so even through this process although I I was scared to put myself out there. They've never shown me that I shouldn't tell them what's going on. It was more my fears and my probably perfectionism too. And so it's been a really interesting journey of just seeing them accept me through this season of Yeah, standing on stages and doing big events and doing things even though that they don't understand, they still have always been very supportive of.
SPEAKER_01:And I love that. And you also have an amazing support community in the sisterhood.
SPEAKER_00:100%. I have a
SPEAKER_01:great group of women around me. They're amazing. So many amazing women that I met just even at the last retreat. If you could go back and speak to yourself before this life-changing moment, what would you say to yourself?
SPEAKER_00:I'd say don't be scared, little sis. Don't be scared because there's something really cool coming for you and although you can't see it and you think you're giving up something that you've built so so big for you there's something bigger beyond that And so just, like, scratch it. It's okay to start over and find what is more aligned for
SPEAKER_01:you. And your past self, could you have seen yourself holding retreats, even in Barbados, that you were probably a little scared the first time you went back to Barbados? Or getting on stage at conferences? You held your own conference. That's pretty amazing. Those are big tasks.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. I definitely could. I could see it blurrily, if that's a word. I could see it but also I didn't see where it could go or what it could be in that season for sure in the beginning because I only had that one vision. And even now, as now I'm a mom, it's changing. So it still kind of feels blurry on where it's going, where it used to be so clear, like having an event or having retreats used to be so clear. And now I'm like, I don't even know where we're going or what's happening, but I know it's something great. Like I can feel the energy. I know it's something great. And just trusting that even when it's foggy to just keep on stepping through.
SPEAKER_01:And it doesn't scare you at all?
SPEAKER_00:No, it doesn't.
SPEAKER_01:Love that. Love that. What habits or mindsets have you let go of since your transformation?
SPEAKER_00:That's a great question. I think the mindset of failure. for sure. And even just recently with things like the event or doing retreats or anything, like I have these visions of like, what if people don't come, especially with the event, you're hosting a big event, you're renting this space, you're putting a lot of money up for it. And you're like, are people even going to want to come to this? Am I the crazy person who's going to be standing there on a stage all by myself? Like there's so much fear that can land in some of that, but I had to let go and just try it anyway. And if you fail, you fail. So what? If you lose some money, you lose some money. It's not a big deal. It's just money. And it's just your, you know, visions and dreams. They can fall away. Things are going to change. And I think when you start to step into that energy, it flows so much easier. There's way more confidence in it because you're just like, whatever. If it fails, it fails.
SPEAKER_01:I love that because so many people would have that as a big barrier in moving forward. What unexpected lessons came from your experience, good or bad?
SPEAKER_00:Unexpected lessons. Oh, man. I feel like there's so many. One, it's like if you put yourself out there, people are going to come. People are going to be attracted to you. and your vulnerability for sure. And we see vulnerability and emotions as weakness a lot. And what was really cool was seeing people feel attracted to it, connected to it, and they wanted more of it and they wanted to be close to it. And I think the more that we can do that as women, stand and use our voices and share what's going on in our lives without the filter of perfection, I think the more people are gonna see that they can do it too. And if we like, I picture, I'm like this weirdo that's like, Like, kumbaya. Like, I picture us all around the world, like, holding hands as women and, like, coming together. And I just, like, think we can do that if we share our voices more and we share our stories more. Because when you share your story, it's going to inspire someone else. And then it's going to inspire another. It's going to, like, trickle down into, like, generations and generations of women who... see the world differently and can see it without pain and without hurt and without fear to some degree. And so, yeah, that's what I visualize. It's like a weird circle of women holding
SPEAKER_01:hands. Well, it helped so much at the last retreat in the thermal therapy when we wanted to go into the cold plunge. That's so cute. We needed to hold hands or else us sisters were not going to
SPEAKER_02:do it.
SPEAKER_01:No.
UNKNOWN:And it was...
SPEAKER_01:transformational for us to see like we needed that support and we did it and we didn't realize how many people were watching us because stepping out and having people clap for you is just so like whoa people were actually watching me
SPEAKER_00:yeah like this is so freaking cool I remember when you walked in you're like I want to do this and I want to hold it for this long and you guys did it and it was so fun to see like yeah
SPEAKER_01:and also this time you had somebody come to the retreat that you had no connection with
SPEAKER_00:at all and Even her pulling up, like I didn't even know what she was going to look like because even when I was like creeping her Facebook, like her Facebook profile picture was a picture of her son. So like I didn't even know. I was like, I hope this is a real human.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. I guess in today's world,
SPEAKER_00:that is a fear. Turns out she's incredible and was such a great addition and totally fit in. I'm a firm believer. I say this over and over in my head when I host events. It's like, who's meant to be here is going to be here. Because I can get caught up in the numbers or get caught up in who isn't coming or the fear of like, oh, well, are they really going to learn something from me? And instead, I just go into the energy of like, who's meant to be here is going to be here. Whether I put these parameters on or put this pressure on it, it's not going to help. So some stranger on Facebook who saw a Facebook event and was like I'm gonna come must have been terrifying to do but like who's meant to be there is gonna be there and they're gonna fit the vibe and they're gonna be the right you know energy for this particular retreat
SPEAKER_01:and it just goes to show how much you attract people in to that joy that you're putting off which I love I I am like the least girliest girl. But every time I zoom into like your podcast, it just makes me feel more like I should feel because working in healthcare, I have to be like, my emotions have to be shut off even though they're there. As a mom, I kind of have to shut off some of my emotions because you don't want to seem like you're weaker to your children. Although I've gotten past that. I totally, totally suggest letting your kid see you cry, fall, do whatever. Don't be perfect. Good, because I cry a lot. So how do you stay anchored now as you keep moving forward?
SPEAKER_00:The big one is leaning on my support system. And again, I'm fresh in motherhood. My son is four months old. He's adorable. Adorable. And I think I could easily say, okay, I'm a mom now. Cut everything off. I'm only 100% doing this. But instead, I've let a lot of people in, leaving them with my husband. He's his dad. Obviously, he's fine. But sometimes I think we can hold on to it so tightly. And I've decided to release my anchor and to be more in that community, focusing on people who want to support us. My sister-in-law has been really great for helping us with babysitting when we need time away or to go out to a movie or whatever. And even though this season can feel like you're drowning because your baby needs you all the time, I've been really trying to lean on people, even just to send a message out and be like, Hey, you know, it's a difficult day. Just want to know if you want to get some cake or something like leaning on people has been the only way I've been able to get through it. And I think that has played a really great role in me feeling so wonderful in postpartum, which I know is not the norm. And I've just been soaking it up because, well, I am older too, but I think that that also plays a a really great part in like leaning on people more
SPEAKER_01:but I absolutely love it that you're co-parenting it's not all on you because I know you heard at the retreat that we're like we do everything for our children and our husbands babysit but they don't really they're a co-parent and I love that you're blending that in from the beginning instead of like halfway through when the kids are a little older you're doing it so he is seeing two consistent people and it's not always mom
SPEAKER_00:yeah
SPEAKER_01:I love it. It's beautiful. I think I teach more of it.
SPEAKER_00:I couldn't do that. I obviously wouldn't be sitting here with you today if that was the case. I wouldn't have had the retreat last weekend. And one thing, too, is like I've also been trying to put a like a bit of a wall up with other people's projections of it, because in Canada, most mothers get a year of maternity leave, if not more now. And so someone going back to work this early is almost crazy. And I've really had to be like, OK, like just because you think I shouldn't be able to do this doesn't mean that I can't. and so I have to see what I can do try my limits and I am not pushing myself to like I'm working maybe 10 hours a week it's not a lot but it's a lot of people's projections on what you should be doing as a mom too that has been difficult and navigating that and I'm like okay I'm gonna figure out what I can do and it only works for me if I try if we do this podcast episode today and it doesn't work out and I'm like my poor baby and I have to go around and run back home I know maybe I pushed myself too far and that's okay in this season to scale back but I feel really good coming here and doing this like a couple hours away to record a podcast and go back in mom mode doesn't feel hard for me so it's and he took care of him all last weekend you know he did give him a big thing he's incredible yeah and he's a wonderful baby he's just a nice little he's a little hit i could
SPEAKER_01:just squeeze his cheeks uh what advice do you give to someone who knows they need a change but feel stuck or afraid
SPEAKER_00:I would say dip your toe in. I think there's a big narrative in this space to go all in. I even used to have a sign on my wall that said, like, leap and the net will appear. And it's like, I see it. Sure. Like, I did take a big leap and do something crazy. But I also think it's okay to, like, dip your toe. Start a little something something. Maybe try a pottery class or go out to coffee with a girlfriend. Have the hard conversation. You can dip your toe in without diving headfirst and see if you're actually going to crash or if something's going to catch you. I think that there's a slower process to it if you are scared to take a leap. And
SPEAKER_01:I love that process because there's such an energy to hustle as soon as you start a business. There's the, you need the website, you need all of the socials, you need everything.
SPEAKER_02:Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_01:Even relaunching this, I was stressing about having a website ready. And I'm like, nope, nope. It can go on my host. I have my socials up. It'll be on YouTube. The website can come as I'm comfortable because I don't want to burn out again.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:But it's easy to get into that hustle because of the society around us. What does a brighter future look like for you today? And how is it different from what you imagined before?
SPEAKER_00:Oh, I was actually thinking about this yesterday. I am in my soft mom era. I'm in my soft and squishy mom season of just taking things slower and enjoying being in the rocking chair, even if it's like three hours or sitting outside in the sunshine. Like I am in my soft season and I think I always visualized and one for anybody listening to this podcast who doesn't know me I never wanted kids and it really shifted for me when I spoke on stage about being child free and I was like oh Maybe I do want a kid. And then I made one. And here we are today. And that also changed things. So I never visualize a season of my life of being in a soft mom era. It was always bigger stages, bigger business, money, money, money, all the things. Right. And I'm actually just like slowing down and enjoying a season of softness, a season of less hustle. And through doing that. Things have been so beautiful, right? To have the retreat last weekend was great. And then to sell out my next retreat that's for next year and not even really have to put too much energy into it. It's because I'm in a soft season and I think people are looking for that where we have been hustle, hustle, hustle. It's so nice to have that permission to be soft. And so I never visualized a life with a baby and I never visualized a season of softness. So it just feels a little strange.
SPEAKER_01:But I'm kind of loving it. It definitely suits you. Thanks. It's so beautiful to watch. Oh, thank you. Because I never actually went to your conference. I wanted to go to that. And there was a retreat before that I wanted to go to. And it's just, you exuded that confidence, but you never talked about motherhood. And I'm not dissing because you weren't in a motherhood. But I've been very much in mother mode. So I really wanted to, but I was also trying to give up a business. I'm strict into mom mode and I'm like, I don't know. I don't know. There's something there that I want to touch, but the second you came out with momhood, I don't know what switched in my brain. I'm like, I should have just went with my gut before. And as you know, I am supposed to listen to my gut because I'm a generator, but I didn't. And I wish I did sooner. So that's a slight regret, but... It definitely suits you.
SPEAKER_00:Thank you. It's so interesting that you say that because there was always, for me, I kept my pregnancy a secret for a long time because I was so fearful. I had this... child-free by choice brand, essentially. And I was so afraid that when I came out that the world, at the same time as me hosting this event, they were gonna be like, I don't wanna, nope, don't wanna be with her anymore. She's gross with a baby. And it did actually attract the right people who wanted to see that season from me. And it was, yeah, very, it was so fearful of me to keep the wall up that nobody was gonna like me after I became a mom, which is just so funny now that you think about it. But It's wonderful to hear you say that because, yeah, it's a good reminder.
SPEAKER_01:And I do want to say there's nothing with being child-free.
SPEAKER_00:100%. Absolutely. Nothing wrong. Some days I still miss it. I'm not going to lie.
SPEAKER_01:Sometimes when I want to get out of mom mode, that is. But just with burnout, I had to make my focuses.
SPEAKER_00:100%.
SPEAKER_01:So before we get to the last question... What's one small thing someone can do to begin raising their own anchor?
SPEAKER_00:One small thing that you can do to start raising your own anchor is just to listen to your intuition. Listen to what it's telling you. Like you just said, listen to your gut. It can tell you something. And even if it's the smallest thing, like, hey, I want burgers for lunch. Have your burger for lunch. Just start to dabble in your intuition because it knows. You know. And every time people are like, I have no idea. I don't know what to do next. You know. It can be the smallest thing. Yeah. It doesn't have to be like, again, jumping off into the abyss, like something small, like having burgers and fries for lunch. Listen, instead of always putting it on your partner or whoever else, like, oh, whatever you want, try to figure out what you want, even in the smallest things.
SPEAKER_01:So for those listening, the anchor crew, where can they connect with you?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so you can follow me over on Instagram at Jess.Clerk. That's C-L-E-R-K-E. Or you can check out my podcast, Selfish Confidence, the issues and brackets. But I think you can just search selfish and it'll come up. And yeah, head on over, send me a message.
SPEAKER_01:So my favorite question. Okay. Who or what inspires you today?
SPEAKER_00:Ooh. Not motivates,
SPEAKER_01:inspires.
SPEAKER_00:Okay, sis, you're gonna make me cry. Because this came up last weekend, too. Was, yeah, just my son. which I never, ever, ever thought I would say, but he just inspires me to be happy. Like, oh man, they flow through those emotions like a roller coaster. Like it could be like a second, you're so happy. And then the next second you're crying your face off and he embraces those emotions and he feels them, right? And I think that that really inspires me to find the joy, but also to work through any other emotions that pop up.
SPEAKER_01:Love that for you. Love that. Well, thank you for coming on today. It's been a pleasure, and I look forward to working with you more in the future. Thanks
SPEAKER_00:so much for having me. This was so much fun.
SPEAKER_01:Thanks for tuning in to Raise the Anchor. If today's episode spoke to you, share it with a friend or leave a review. It helps more people find their way to healing and hope. Follow along on Instagram, TikTok, or YouTube for behind the scenes, extra content, and real life moments. And be sure to join the email list at linktree.com. So you never miss an episode. Until next time, here's to calm waters, steady winds, and the courage to chart your own course.
